Chaotic hurt memories
run through
her mind, her heart
like a reel of endless movie,
in selective, seductive replay.
She clings to the hurt,
the unwanted pain,
like a bruised, bored cat
plays with a frightened rat.
The act of compulsive
hurt feelings, betrayal for
love and hate is
so convoluted,
so enduring,
the chest pain
nagging incessantly,
like bloated air
gargling in the gut.
Unable to forget
past hurt,
continues to register
the same blame,
and blaming game,
again and again,
like melted ice, thaw and
re-frozen with each chill.
Overrides love feelings
in the past, present or
future, the freedom of what
to remember, to forget
what must or need to be
forgotton, or unremembered.
To run or step down
on a hate treadmill, for the
hearts and pulses,
do relate or resonate
in tortuous circuitries
not easy to control,
smart tricks turn smarting.
A simple apology,
a sincere remorse,
a big step backwards,
without many words
or thoughts. It’s so easy
and yet very, very hard
to make that move
to let go
of hurt, and
to hold on
to the healing power
of love, forever
so bitter sweet.

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